Saturday, October 18, 2008
周杰伦 - 说好的幸福呢你的绘画凌乱着在这个时刻我想起喷泉旁的白鸽甜蜜散乱了情绪莫名的拉扯我还爱你呐伴你断断续续唱着歌假装没事了时间过了 走了爱情面临选择你冷了 却了我哭了一开始的不快乐你用卡片拭写着有些爱只给到这真的痛了Chrous:怎麽了 你累了 说好的 幸福呐 我懂了 不说了 爱淡了 梦淹了 开心与不开心 一一叙说着 你在不舍 那些爱过的感觉都太深刻 我都还记得你不等了 说好的 幸福呐 我错了 泪干了 放手了 后悔了 只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着 要怎么停呢
5:18 AM
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
right now is 6.30am....another 26 hour i will be heading to another island for my next part of life....yes! i'm going tekong bmtc school 2 to train to protect country....haha....but somehow i just felt that time really pass by very fast....it's seem like yesterday i just completed my week zero orientation or just had a great night of fun with all my fellow kiakis....though my outside or words says that i'm not afraid of going army and treat it like very easy to get pass....but deep down inside i'm panicing about what kind of life it will be inside....i know it will be tough with all the training....but how tough will it get....will i still be remembered when i book out after 2 weeks....or will i just spend my weekend at home sleeping and sleeping....recently have been wondering....what kind of ze sheng aka eric have he turned into....have he turned into someone that become super picky and easily hate and look down on people....have he turn into a person that people just hates him for who he is now....recently realised that i'm will get pissed or angry with someone very VERY VERY VERY easily....for instance like dislike people to report some small matters to another person that is concern....for example talking to a friend about another friend rumours and he/she went to tell that another friend about it....and that in return i become very cautious about their character and about what i want to chat with them....am i taking some small little small fishy thing way too serious....am i thinking way too much into people's act or word....right now before i actually get enlist into tekong....inside my heart i actually wish to see one person the most....but i know she won't be reading the blog so i shall just say it here....i really wish to see xiao zhu zhu aka piggy aka danicia alot....because i know very well that some space inside my heart still thinks about her....is she doing well or is she feeling stressed up? from the time i know her....i know she very easily get stressed up and always needed someone to be there for her....someone to be there to cheer her up and make her feel confidence in doing her assignment....someone to always show her concern if she very late still doing assignment and also waking her up everyday because she always can't wake up on time de....recently heard from her friend that she felt very sad the next day after we had a big quarrel the other night....i know i had made a big mistake and i regret it alot ALOT....but somehow i'm just concerned....i'm concerned about you....because i simply just can't lose you....because you had been very precious to me ever since we get to know each other closely....i also didn't feel good after that quarrel up till now....many times i wish to sms, msn and even call you....but i just don't dare to....because i scared you might treat me like a stranger....alot of times when i happen to pass by places that we once spend time together....it will always remind me of you....still remember near your house the bubble tea shop....now and then when i happen to go there to have dinner at the market....i will always remember that day when we sit outside the shop and take photo of you and listening to the mp3 you let me listen....now i just wish to tell you i'm really sorry about how i treat you....because to me you mean oxygen....the moment i don't have oxygen....my life seem to become black and white and nothing seem interesting....i'm so anxious about you and him hanging out together and in close contact means that i somehow afraid that one day you might just stick together very often and completely lose communication with you....frankly speaking....my hearts bleed everytime i asked you to go find him and ask him to take care of you....because that's is just a stupid angry comment....SORRY DANICIA!!!
6:09 AM
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
finally GRADUATED le....haha....today was my graduation ceremony....had a fun day with all my class and course mate....had so much photo-taking and catch up session with them after the ceremony....after that went to esc to rest and slack while waiting for ong to finish his session....haha....but today was a great day in terms of fun....but in terms of people....was quite disappointed bah....cause she actually promised to meet me days ago to take photo with me on graduation....but in the end she said don't want....maybe because as she said she really tired bah....so i can't really blame her....but then i really looking forward to today to meet her and take photo with her and spend time with her....but in the end it turns out to be a disappointment....haiz....=(
11:11 PM
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
should i let go and move on with reality....but it's so hard to let go leh....anyway since the reality is proven in front of my face and mind that i'm the old things and she doesn't care anymore....i guess it's time i should let go....but what i really sad now is that the way she treat me is like dumping away something that she lost interest in....to me she is just like another huiyi or janice bah....but at least janice is better than her in some way....in her i finally see that she is really another girl that want new things to experience....seriously i should not trust her so much in the first place....because i trust her too much that she take my trust for granted and make fun of it....look like i really should choose the kind of person that i can really put my full trust in them....
12:40 AM
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
i feeling so uneasy all of a sudden....just when i feel that everything is going well for me and her....something really just makes me go on a low tone....it's will be one month since me and her like know each other and everything have really going very well....but out of nowhere....someone that she's is contacting frequently more often than me really makes me feel uneasy....ya....it's the guy that she know from jam & hop during the orientation....and today she told me so much thingsfor your info....she told me that his name is also called eric....and she even said that he's entertaining and fun....which in the past few weeks she said she don't really feel like sms or talk to....but today she told me that he's fun and entertaining to sms with....and she regard me as the caring kind....so does that mean she wish to have 2 person character....and just now when i was talking on the phone i can also guess that is he smsing her in the middle when we were talking....and i guess must be she keep smsing him also bah....and she actually asking me whether to call or sms to reply....the moment she said she got the idea to call already make me feel as though my heart drop from 19th floor....and i actually told her say i put down the phone and she go either call or sms him....i just feel so helpless now....in her i see that i'm just a understanding senior she can look for when she needs help and guidance....besides that i think to her i'm really nothing anymore....though she always call me by the nick she gave me....but somehow i feel that she now calling to make me happy....but in actual fact i feel that she's more happy when smsing him....
1:27 AM
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
so bored!!!so bored!!!so bored!!!life is really bored without any school or things to do....but one thing that really occupies me is the appear of my xiao zhu zhu aka piggy....because it's she that let me know what i can do each single day....which is to meet her and accompany her home....and now she have become a important part of my life that i will be very lost if i don't have her now....but today actually had a history repeat....2 years ago when i was still with a girl that is my best love....we were suppose to meet at ikea tampinese together with my friend to shop around....then she suddenly told me that she meeting her friends at ikea too and going out later when she reached....and once she told me that she went off to meet her friends and from then on it's the end of us....today actually have something similar....but i do not wish to talk about it....because so far she had treat me very good and i can't really blame her this time....but anyway....i'm enlisting into tekong bmtc school 2 on july 9th @ 11.30am....so time will really flies like rocket....=)
3:52 AM
Thursday, April 24, 2008
everything just seem to pass so fast....a blink of an eye i already now a graduated tp student....which also mark the start of my next part of life - ARMY! but seriously i don't wish to leave tp....to me tp is just like my second family....alot of fun, sorrow, anger and obstacles faced happens in tp....but to think of it i can't always stay in tp forever and also i will still grow old so i can't really catch up with what the young ones think if i really stay in tp forever....but right now i just felt so missed tp....for the past 2 week had cried because there's is something that i have for tp which really make me don't really want to leave tp....that particular thing is LOVE....1. the love for all my friends from all over the school2. the love for camp and fun and major event like open house where tp student all gather as one3. the love for tp school song, mass dance and chicky dance4. lastly....the love for who i am now because of what tp have taught me2 more months before i will be enlist into bmtc school 2....will i still be able to sing tp song one last time in camp? will i really have the chance to return to tp often for camps after i enlist? will people call me out whenever i book out to catch up the time lost?
10:59 PM
